The Dumbest Dating Mistake Everyone Makes… (Matthew Hussey, Get The Guy)

[Music] okay here’s what I’m gonna do this is gonna be a magic trick this weekend I release a video about something I call the Bliss point the food industry has a term a term called the Bliss point the Bliss point is the optimal level of salty and sweet in a food that keeps you wanting more of it think Nutella think peanut butter kettle corn what’s the Bliss point that means even though you’re getting full you’re not satiated you keep wanting more of that food I believe there’s a Bliss point in communication and what I have done for this weekend’s video that comes out Saturday evening for YouTube is I have broken down three text messages from guys and given people three response three Bliss point responses one for each text here’s my prediction this is the magic trick there are going to be a decent number of comments under this video from women who say something along the lines of if a guy isn’t texting me on the day of our date and isn’t giving me a plan or is being flaky or is making me do all the work screw him I’m not gonna send in one of these sweet solely messages who you talk about not gonna be nice I’m not gonna be kind and they’re all they’ll have some like hash tag that says boy bye or something mark my words in anticipation of these comments because I know they’re coming I started to think about this and I thought what what will I say to those people who I already know are going to say it even though they don’t know they’re going to say it yet you don’t have to be ruthless in your tone you know if you are ruthless in your actions I’ll repeat you don’t have to be ruthless in your tone if you are ruthless in your actions in fact if you are ruthless in your actions you can be sweet as pie in your tone tone isn’t that big of a consequence tone just has the ability to make you sound really unattractive and hurt by something so what tone has the potential to do is show someone they have total power over your emotions I get angry with you I get pissy with you I do that whole boy buy all I’m showing is that you have actually had an effect on me you’ve actually angered me you who I barely know you who I barely know who might as well be a stranger we’ve seen each other this little you have had this much of an effect on my emotions no you have a standard and that standard is you’re a great person you’re a kind person you’re a positive person and so when someone does something that doesn’t meet your standards you don’t become a mean passive-aggressive obnoxious difficult nasty snippy person you stay sweet and kind and positive and warm but your actions tell the story of the consequences that’s the most powerful part of dating if you want to know what I think is the dumbest mistake people are making and dating it’s wearing all of their consequences in their tone and none of them in their actions because I guarantee that same woman who’s getting all angry and and bitter and passive-aggressive in her tone I’ll guarantee that same woman a week later if he gets all sweet with her well we’ll start to maybe think about seeing him again in other words she is ruthless in her tone and completely moldable and malleable in her actions the reverse is much more powerful you know I see people get so pissed off in their tone it’s because they really are planning on seeing him again they’re like why do you do this you’re making this so difficult I really want to see you and I like you and he ever annoying me why didn’t you you think you could just do this to me but they’re angry at themselves not angry they’re angry at themselves because they know tomorrow they’re still gonna want to see him [Music] that’s what they pissed off about screw you for making me swallow my pride in the text I’m gonna send you tomorrow you know you’re not angry if you don’t care about if you’re not really interested in seeing someone again you don’t get angry do you like if you’re out of my life tomorrow and I’m never gonna see you again am I really that angry no I’m like I’m on to the next day but it’s because I care and it’s because I am gonna see you again and I’m gonna 100% screw over my own standards to see you again and I hate that you’re making me into this person who compromises on her standards because she likes you I hate that and now I’m gonna get angry with you as a result and I’m gonna show you that you have all this power over me moral of the story is this be ruthless in your actions be kind in your tone you will find dating is much easier for you and you’ll find you get far more attraction not only will you get far more attraction but you’ll actually be the one in control you