How to Get a Guy’s Attention
How to get a guy’s attention and make him want you more than you want him!
Wondering how to get a guy’s attention? How to keep his attention once you have him? Maybe even how to get a guy to want you?
I have 27 tips that can help you attract more attention from men in every possible situation you can imagine. I show you how to get a guy’s attention and how to keep a guy interested. How to prevent the biggest pitfall that has caused countless relationships to break down.
Suppose you see a nice guy somewhere and you would like to get to know him better…you just have no idea how!
Or suppose you have known a man for a long time, but this man never gives you the kind of attention you would really like to receive from him…
How to get a guy’s attention and what to do to keep his attention…
How do you ensure you keep his attention?
If these are the questions you’re looking to get answered, you are in the right place. You will discover how to draw his attention and keep it.
For convenience I have divided this article into 3 parts:
1: How to get a guy’s attention before you meet
2: Tips on how to get a guy’s attention during and after first conversation
3: Discover how to get a guy’s attention and then how to keep a guy interested in you once you’re in a relationship with him
Part 1: How to get a guy’s attention once you notice him and like him
- Make use of his superficiality
You and I can deny it. We can even have endless discussions about it. But fact remains: men are superficial.
Irritating? Once in a while. Handy? Time will tell
Look. Men fall for outer looks. That is because men are visually minded beings.
Do you look good? Then you will attract his attention.
But before you run to get a jar of slimming pills, wait a minute…
Men are superficial. But not that superficial
You do not have to look like a supermodel to attract any man’s attention.
There is a kind of man suitable for every woman, no matter what you look like. This means there is a group of men who will be attracted to you specifically.
There are men who fall for:
Women with red hair, etc.
So you do not have to look like a supermodel. What must you do then?
Take care of yourself
Spend time in front of the mirror
Although the gym and healthy food can never hurt, these three things are good to keep in mind when you wonder how to get a guy’s attention and enough to attract someone’s attention.
- How to get a guy’s attention: Show some skin
You’ve probably seen one of those absurd bullfights on TV. If so, then you know what effect a red cloth has on the poor bull.
Bare skin of a woman has the same effect on a man:
Men love it.
This is not a license to walk around naked from now on. Although you undoubtedly will draw attention if you do, this is not how to get a guy’s attention if you want a lasting relationship
What I mean by ‘show some skin’ is:
Wear clothes that show some skin
When a man looks at a group of women, where his gaze lingers is the place where he sees a lot of skin.
Just do not go too far here. Research shows that about 40% of bare skin works best.
Anyway, bare skin is a nice way to attract a man’s attention.
- Dress code: Red
Above I made a comparison between a man and a bull. I know, weird comparison, but with this tip I’m going to do the same thing again. You have been warned…
When a bull is confronted with a red cloth, it chases after it. And as soon as you wear red, a man’s brain go crazy…
It is true that men find women in red more attractive.
Still wondering how to get a guy’s attention? You guessed it. If red is your color, then wear it, and wear it often.
You’ll do even better by wearing red and showing some skin
- How to get a guy’s attention by being a goddess
It’s summer. Together with three friends I sit in the sun on a terrace. The street is full of beautiful women. Then something happens that stays with me for months…
… In the distance I see a woman walking. At first glance not my type of woman. But something keeps my eyes glued on her…
I look at my friends. To my surprise, they all look in her direction also.
My attention is no longer focused on her, but on the way my friends react. They almost look mesmerized…
Afterwards I asked what they thought of her. They all said:
“Yes…well…she looked nice enough, but her radiance…WOW…”
Which brings us to the following:
Outer appearance versus inherent radiance
As I said before, men fall for the outer appearance of women. But that is not the only thing that attracts a man’s attention. Radiance is just as important.
A radiant woman is an attractive woman.
It’s that simple.
How to get a guy’s attention by having a radiant look:
Work on your confidence
Have an interesting life full of fun
Surround yourself with nice and positive people
Make sure you are comfortable in your skin. Do this, and you will notice that you are getting more and more attention from nice men.
- Smile: How to get a guy’s attention when smiling
“Gee” he thinks, “could I speak to her without being rejected?”
No matter how tough men may seem, speaking to women is dreaded by most of us
I see it with all my male friends, family, colleagues… you understand my point: I see it in all men.
If you want to ensure that you get more attention from men, then this is how to get a guy’s attention: a very simple solution: smile!
A smile says:
Hi, it’s safe to speak to me, I do not bite.
When a man sees you smiling at him, he thinks, “Hey, maybe I’ll take a chance with her.”
So the next time you see a nice man, do not forget to smile.
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- How to get a guy’s attention: Make eye contact
This goes hand in hand with the previous tip. Smiling and making eye contact at the same time is a powerful flirting weapon.
Right, you understand it perfectly well. By doing this you seduce him from a distance.
When you do this, he thinks: “She smiles. Check. She looks. Check. This is my chance.”
- How to get a guy’s attention by being approachable
It’s Friday night. I stand in the bar which I frequent weekly. Around me I see the same thing happening every week: women clasping their bags with their arms.
All of them nice women. That’s why I think it’s such a shame. With their body language they eliminate every nice man. Because yes, that is what happens when you have the wrong body language.
Okay, drunk men may try.
But the nice sober men? They have something like: “Next.”
Do yourself a favor: make sure you come across as approachable. What you do is:
Make eye contact
This makes it so much easier to attract a guy’s attention. Plus, he is more likely to start talking to you. He’s not talking to you? Do not panic. Now you…
- How to get a guy’s attention? Say: ‘Hi’
(Some) rules are made to be broken. This applies to the unwritten (and outdated rule) that “men-must-take-initiative”.
As a woman you can now approach a man. Moreover: men love it when a woman does this. You read that correctly. Men like to be approached by women. They regard this a great compliment, and they love it.
Let’s just do a little math. Suppose you meet one nice guy every week. That is 52 nice men a year. Of the 52, ten appeal to you (optimistically speaking). There are thus 42 chances that you miss every year. Do you still wonder why finding the right man takes so long?
I understand that it is scary thing to just walk up to a total stranger. But hey, is that little moment of fear not worth it, if that translates into a nice man at your side?
Part 2: How to get a guy’s attention and keep it during a conversation
- How to get a guy’s attention: Ask him for advice
When you talk to a man, this is what happens:
He records information, he analyses this information and he tries to find a solution
As you can see, men are very logical. We get satisfaction when we can fix something for you.
Irritating? Once in a while. Useful information? You can count on YES.
It makes a man feel important. And if you can keep him feeling important, you can demand all his attention.
And that is possible! Simply by asking him for advice.
Say for example:
“Hey, do you happen to know how this coffee machine works?”
So it does not have to be complicated things at all. It is purely about the underlying principle that a man wants to take care of you.
- How to get a guy’s attention: Avoid emotionally charged subjects
At the beginning of the dating phase, there is one topic that you absolutely want to avoid: emotional topics.
That does not mean that you cannot have in-depth conversations or that you cannot be vulnerable.
But at least not about:
A painful relationship with your ex
Your difficult childhood (if you had one)
This is a sure-fire way to get a man to withdraw from the conversation and you stand to lose his attention.
Maybe you now think: What can I talk about then?
Let him do the talking, ask him about his goals and passions, ask about his family, superheroes, his teen years, where he likes to travel, his food preferences, etc.
- How to get a guy’s attention by learning from SpongeBob
Do you remember SpongeBob? That crazy cartoon that takes place under water. For the readers who do not know him: SpongeBob is the protagonist, his opponent is Octo.
There is a big difference between the two.
SpongeBob is always:
Nice to others
Octo is always:
Unkind to others
As a result, SpongeBob receives a lot of positive attention from others and Octo not. Well, I know it’s a cartoon, but in real life it works like this:
Everyone loves happy and fun people
This is not to say that from now on you will have to portray the over-optimistic fun-filled woman. Just make sure that you are a nice person to deal with.
The moment you do not get attention from nice men, it is not because there are no nice men, but because you may have to change something.
The fact that you are reading this article is already a positive sign.
If you apply these tips with an optimistic attitude – such as SpongeBob – then it is only a matter of time before you get more attention from men.
- How to get a guy’s attention: Show interest
Except for teenagers, everyone likes to talk to someone who shows interest.
And if you have never noticed, men really love talking about themselves.
So ask a guy a question and listen breathlessly to his stories. Remember we mentioned this earlier? Ask about his family, teen years, hopes and dreams, etc.
Guaranteed to attract his attention.
And before you think: ‘Yes, but when I do that, he talks about himself all evening’…rest assured.
The scales principle
If you have his attention – by showing interest in him – then there comes a moment when he asks himself something like:
“Gosh, who is this person who is so interested in me?”
The more interest you show in him, the more curious he becomes about who you are.
Think of it as a scale.
There comes a moment when the scale is totally out of balance. At that moment he can hardly do anything else than ask you all kinds of questions. Just to get the scale back in balance.
Not only do you now have his attention, but also a conversation with a curious man.
- How to get a guy’s attention? Laugh at his jokes
Sometimes it is annoying, but every man thinks he is funny.
When a man is in a room full of people and there is only one person who laughs at his jokes, he automatically draws closer to that person.
Simply because men seek confirmation.
When you laugh at his jokes, you give him confirmation. As a result, he feels good.
He links these good feelings to you
“Gee, I do not know what it is…but every time I’m with her I feel good,” he thinks.
Three guesses what happens then? He wants to be in close vicinity to you more often.
So if you meet a nice man, laugh at his jokes (even if he is not that funny)
This is a very simple way to draw a man’s attention to you.
- How to get a guy’s attention: Flirt with him
You can have great conversations with a man, but what if it stays that way? Then there is a chance that you may end up in the friend zone.
I recently received an email from a woman who was in the friend zone for seven years. When she decided to take action, she found out that the guy liked her also.
Now, seven years later, they are finally a couple in a relationship.
All’s well that ends well, but save yourself that unbearably long waste of time.
How? Simple. Flirt with him.
Look. Friends talk to each other. But couples do just that AND they flirt. So if you like a man, make sure you do the same.
- How to get a guy’s attention: Make statements
If you want to keep his attention, you want to avoid the questions below as much as possible
‘How old are you?’
‘What kind of work do you do?’
‘Where are you from?’
A simple way to get around this is to make statements:
So instead of: “How old are you?” you say ‘Let me guess, I think you are 28.’
So you make an assumption instead of asking him a question.
In this way, conversations are much more fun. A man can do two things when you make an assumption about him:
You’re right (I am 28)
He contradicts you
This is more fun than asking him just a standard question. And when you make your conversations more fun in this way, you will hold his attention much longer.
- How to get a guy’s attention: Give him compliments
This is something I often say to women. Complimenting him is another way to a man’s heart (besides eating and sex).
Do not be fooled by the way men act when you pay them a compliment. When they pretend they do not care about it, they fake it. They think it’s crazy nice actually.
If you say to a man: ‘Your hair looks sexy this way’, he will remember that months later.
Even when a man does not like a woman, he will not quickly forget that compliment.
And it’s actually pretty funny…
Men are more insecure than you think
Our testosterone-filled brain forces us to be the best, funniest and toughest man on earth.
For this we however constantly seek confirmation.
Only when we get that confirmation, do we feel good.
If you give a man that confirmation, he will automatically find it nice to be close to you. He will give you more attention and he will have good feelings about you.
How do you “confirm” a man? It’s very simple. Give him compliments.
Because of this he finds you fun and he can no longer stay away from you.
- How to get a guy’s attention: Touch him occasionally
OK, I’ll admit it, this is perhaps a bit scary. But do not panic. I do not mean that you have to hang around his neck all evening.
What do I mean?
Tap his shoulder briefly
Take imaginary fluff from his hair
Put your hand on his chest when he jokes
This kind of touch creates attraction, and that is not all…
The benefits of touching
People who touch other people are those who:
We trust more
We find more sympathetic
Come over more friendly
We find more attractive
Once you break through the touch barrier, you will find that a guy treats you in a very different way.
- How to get a guy’s attention by being a bit controversial
If you are trying to please everyone, I have bad news for you. You may keep everyone happy in this way, but not everyone will really enjoy being with you. This is certainly not how to get a guy’s attention either!
Herd animals, we have enough of those.
How do we distinguish ourselves from them? There are two ways to respond:
There are people who really like them… and then
There are people who really do not like them.
Now I understand that is scary. Nobody likes it when people do not like them. But the reality is…
There will always be people who do not like you (or me). That is life!
So you are not helping yourself when you try to make everybody happy.
People will always have an opinion about other people, whether people like it or not.
You may wonder what this has to do with men.
Well look. A nice man wants a woman who is real. A woman who is not afraid to share her opinion and who goes after what she wants.
And the only way to accomplish this is by being somewhat controversial.
Suppose you are talking to a nice man. You are discussing football. He is crazy about it. Not you. Do not say that you like football, just say what you really think.
Not only will you attract the right guys, you will now be better able to keep a man interested.
- How to get a guy’s attention: Be the queen of conversation
You walk on a busy shopping street. In the distance you see someone standing in the middle of the street. A bright colored jacket. A big grin on his face. And the weird habit of speaking to any passer-by.
In other words, a street vendor.
And there is a good reason why they stand there every time, simply because it works.
What you can learn from this
A lot of men and women come to me with the question: ‘What should I say to someone I like?’
Simply by remembering a few questions, you can ensure that you always have something to say.
Having this knowledge, your self-confidence increases when you are in conversation with men. It is no wonder those street vendors look so confident, they know what to ask…
Some questions you can ask are:
- If you could choose from everyone in the world, who would you like to eat with?
- Would you like to be famous? In what way?
- What would a perfect day look like for you?
- If you had the ability to become ninety and you would either have the spirit or body of a thirty-year-old, what would you choose?
- Do you have a secret foreboding about how you might die later?
- Name three things that you have in common with each other.
- What are you most grateful for in your life?
- If you could change something about the way you were raised, what would that be?
- Try to tell your partner your story as detailed as possible in four minutes.
- If you could wake up tomorrow with a new quality and a new quality, what would that be?
- If you had a glass ball that could tell you the truth about yourself, your life, your future or any other topic, what would you like to know?
- What is the greatest achievement of your life?
Try to memorize a few of these and you will never wonder what to talk about again
Part 3: How to get a guy’s attention and keep it once you are in a relationship with him
- How to get a guy’s attention by avoiding this pitfall at all cost
“Now that I have his attention, how can I make sure I keep his attention?”
Good question. But first I want to talk about a common mistake so many couples make.
Because if you do this, it is a really bad mistake…
What am I talking about?
You must continue to work on your relationship, because the following applies to most couples:
The longer they are in a relationship, the less effort they put into it. They get too comfortable with each other; neglecting those things they used to do to keep one another interested…
And if there is something really harmful to a relationship, this is it.
This can be prevented simply by continuing to do your best:
Continue to work on your outer appearance
Keep your sex life fun and exciting
Keep caring and doing sweet things for him
By this I do not mean that you are the only one who has to take care of this. He should also do just that. But the reason I say it to you is because I am talking to you now.
- How to get a guy’s attention? Let him do something for you
Men love women they must make an effort for, and are crazy about women who make them work to keep HER interested in them
I do not know why, it may not be very smart.
But we just like to do things for you.
So ask him the moment you go to the toilet:
‘Hey, I’m running to the toilet quickly, you mind getting me a drink?’
Or if the guy’s you like is your neighbor:
“Could you please help me move the cupboard to the other side of the room?”
When you let a man do things for you, he will find you much more fun afterwards.
Let him invest time, energy and money in you. Because of this he will get more and more interested in you.
- How to get a guy’s attention: Let him know that you like him
This may sound a little crazy, but imagine for thirty seconds that you are a man.
Okay, so you’re a man.
And being a man you get confronted with the following:
- A woman who likes you pretends she does not like you.
- A woman who does not like you, behaves exactly the same as the one who likes you.
Do you understand how confusing this can be for men?
What do you say? You say you understand? Beautiful. I am glad we agree on that.
A man wants to know that he stands a chance
If a man does not feel that he can take a chance with you, he loses interest.
It is often the case that men prefer to protect their egos rather than taking a risk.
That is why it is crucial to let him know that you like him, but you also do not want to make it too easy for him. What this looks like in practice:
It’s Tuesday night. He sends you a message at 23:00 asking if you would like to visit him. Your response:
“Sorry, I’m not the type of woman who comes to visit you so late. But because I think you are a very nice man, I propose we have a cup of coffee in the city on Saturday afternoon.”
This way he knows he stands a chance, but at the same time you do not make it too easy for him. The perfect way to keep his attention.
- How to get a guy’s attention by getting to know him
I find it quite funny that couples who have known each other for years, do not really know each other.
The in-depth conversations they had in the beginning have given way to the evening program on TV
Every holiday they discover the same thing: “Gosh, how crazy, there is so much we still do not know about each other.”
Anyway, who am I to say anything about that…
But since many of these relationships end up broken, I hope that you will do things differently.
Continue to have in-depth discussions with each other. Keep on getting to know one another better
- How to get a guy’s attention: show you care
There are a number of things you can do to ensure a man feels attracted to you on an unconscious level.
One is caring.
Unconsciously we see a caring woman as a suitable mother for our (future) children.
And once a man has the impression that you will be a suitable mother, he automatically feels more attracted to you.
This knowledge can of course come in very handy.
Let him know that you are a suitable mother
This can be accomplished by doing simple little things, such as:
Bring him a cup of coffee in the morning
Cook his favorite meal once in a while
Show that you care for other people in your area
Send him a message to ask about his grandmother in hospital
Maybe it’s a bit far-fetched, but things like these can very well make you both happy and end with you growing old together.
- Do not make it too easy for him
Men by nature are hunters. Both in the beginning of a relationship and twenty years later.
And if you make it too easy for him, you will deprive him of the opportunity to ‘hunt’ you.
Because of this, two things happen:
- He loses interest
- He makes less effort where you are concerned
This is no fun for either of you.
That is why it is good not to make it too easy for him. Do not always give him what he wants. Let him put in some effort for you. OK…so how to get a guy’s attention when you play hard to get? Reward him only once he has actually put some effort into his attraction to you.
If good sex is missing in your relationship, the relationship is a ticking time bomb.
Good sex is so essential that when it is lacking, it always causes problems.
To keep a man’s attention, good sex is therefore crucial.
And although partners often experience sex as good in the beginning, there are few partners who after years of being together still think that sex is good.
In itself quite understandable.
Keeping it exciting and fun after all this time is not exactly easy.
But there is a way to make it easier for yourself…
What men want in bed and during sex
There are a number of things that can cause a man to get excited again and again. When you know what these are, it is a breeze to keep his attention.
What are these things?
There are many, but here are some important ones:
- Provide variation
- Surrender yourself to him totally
- Discover his deepest fantasies and go with them
- Give a man time
If more women would follow this advice, there would be a lot less single people.
When the next step – whatever that may be – feels like moving too fast for a guy, he runs.
For a man, a serious relationship is such a big step that he has to be 100% sure about it.
And that takes time. A lot of time.
When you give a man enough time, the chance of being in a relationship with him is many times greater than if you do not. So give him enough time and do not put him under pressure…he’ll leave and that will be the end of (another) relationship for you.
Chances are he will more quickly realize that he wants you when you allow him to calmly and rationally think about how much fun it is to have you in his life. You now know how to get a guy’s attention and keep him attracted, apply these tips and you’ll see it works.